Sheesh. Its raya, we just had a family came to raya-ing. Last year i got my hair permed and this girl looked at me and said 'Napa rambut mu, kna karan?' This year she looked at me and said gamuk jua!. I wonder what she'll say next year. I hate it when that family come here. I used like them. I feel two faced. Ofcourse infront of them i'll be all okay.. The little kids were annoying. Why do kids like squeky shoes? Does it amuse themselves? its f**king annoying.

 

I know i've gained weight this year. and height. I'm still growing! I used to be so small and eat so little. Now i'm eating more and growing its a bad thing too??!! I'm not even overweight yet. Sure my shoulders are broader than normal and i cant properly fit into size M clothes because of it.. but i dont think i'm that fat. I need input. Am i seriously that fat? 

 

Next is my 'walking' problem. My mum said i'm a bit..'bongkok'. I cant help it! i need to look down when i walk. But i need to stop doing that. i need people to tell me to stop me when i'm doing it.

 

AAaahh.. my self esteem is way low right now.

 

Just now there was no current in the neighbourhood for like 3 hours or so.

 

Today is not a good day..

 

First of all, i just ate some yogurt thats why i'm yogurt high~ XP

 

Today is a day of crying for Form 3 and 5

 

We went to the mosque and performed the sembahyang hajat and sembahyang taubat. Suprisingly the motivator is very um.. wise? His words makes loads of sense and meaning and his bacaans were so..merdu. I almost cried. Some people actually cried.

 

Then the ceramah was fun. We are the BEST BEST BEST! (two thumbs up!) hehe

 

The most memorable thing was the student with parents session. Parents and their children sat on the dewan legar floor with each other. Its a very pleasant sight. We (the ones that didnt have our parents with us) had to sit in a group of ten with 1 female teacher. We were all 11 students (me, pipah, sharifah,amal, ummie, peng, anne, lyana and eqah) sat togather in a circle with mrs.phang. Yes mrs.phang! She was

so kind, funny and nice. She kept saying 'Wah.. i have many daughters!" hehe. You'll make a great mother mrs.phang!

 

First we were to put our arms around each other and baca zikir ngan the motivators. The non-muslims can keep queit ja.. We all baca out loud and campur dngan the zikir and melody.. it felt very.. pleasing. Then Fiqah started to cry. one by one started to cry. Now parents were to talk openly to their children, children were to hug them and say what they wanted to them, ask for forgiveness. Every1 was very into it. Almost everyone in our group started crying even mrs.phang. At first i thought why is pkah crying? why eqah's crying? at that time i didnt felt anything i was afraid something was wrong with me. Then i started to look around.. students were being hugged with their parents and family..they get to pour their hearts out. My parents were across the ocean!and i cant do anything bout it. When i saw everything it was so sad to me, i've never really hugged my parents even though i wanted to so much. I started to cry. Every1 cried. There was no need to explain. I wish my parents were there...Sharifah was crying so badly i dont know how to comfort her. I'm glad we were hugging each other, when i felt pipah's hand on mine, i felt a bid better. Thanks pipah :)

 

then we had a practical directly after that. Was sooo not in the mood for physics.

 

Its 9.11pm, my parents just msg-ed me. They didnt even called. They didnt even ask how was the motivational talk or anything.. :(

 

Tomorrow i have a chem practical. Thermometric Titration...I hope i dont mess up..

 

man.. i'm still emotionally unstable.

Yesh.. i'm the stirrer >.<

When i help my mum, i have to stir the cake mix

When i help my dad, i have to stir the paint

 

Its that time again. Time to make raya biscuits and cakes. But sadly i dont feel the eagerness. I'm usually the one askin my mum what she's going to make like weeks early. I'm still helping her though.

 

I got a new job, helping my dad paint the house. fun fun even more if i didnt have such a suckish brush.

I'm a bit eager for my dad to finish the stairs cause the curtains are taken off and at night people can actually see through the tinted glass window. I'm always afraid that my neighbours can see me in my pjs.

 

Tomorrow's malay oral. I dont know what to prepare. >.<

 

Thursday my parents goin to s'pore. I cant follow. Wish it was holidays, then i could go.. I miss s'pore food. hehehe

 

Today school was okay. Bag felt empty. And i have to says i'm gettin sick of Past year qsns. Esp. maths.

Again i was so tired at BM had trouble to open my eyes. Tomorrow i must not sleep after sahur. ngantuk aja nanti.

Sharifah was especially 'naughty' today. But its fun sitting next to her during bio at least i dont dread the lessons much

 

I'm nearly finished with Tantei Gakuen Q. Still waiting for the subs of the last episode. Episode 10 was very suspense. Yama-chan is not guilty! XP Not much new news of HS Jump..

 

Yesterday my cus told me there's a rumor that Fahrenheit had an accident. I was like OMG WHAT??1!. But of course it was wrong. False rumors are so troublesome. Aaron is still in wheelchair. Hope he recovers quick

 

Lastly.. I wanna see my baju rayas! My mum keep saying she'll pick it up later but she doesnt. I dont remember how many i have. I think i already have 3-4 at home. but i know my mum sent more than that. Raya's comin. I'll be weird havin exams then. I dont think i ever had exam during raya